May was a tough month. I wrote about Mike’s passing last month, then three weeks later we lost another good man, Micah’s Godfather Wayne Murray. Wayne’s death was not unexpected like Mike’s was, as Wayne had fought a long fight for years against illness. We knew that he was nearing his end of time with us. Yet it still felt like a punch to the heart to those who loved him.
For many years, Wayne and Lynda have sat in front of us in church. Yes, we New Englanders are stuck in our ways and usually make our way to the same pew each week, unless someone new comes to church who does not know they are in our spot. Micah dislikes change as much or more than most of us, so he has been known to stand and stare at the poor people who have no clue that they were sitting where he is used to sitting. I have done my best to catch up with him and usher him to another pew before things get too awkward.
Sitting behind Wayne and Lynda has been helpful in many ways. Lynda is so used to Micah locating stray hairs on her that she does not flinch when his hand blasts over her pew to remove the errant hairs off of her in the middle of the sermon or during quiet times of prayer. Wayne was always willing to sneak snacks back to Micah during the service if he thought Micah might enjoy what he brought in. Micah knew Wayne was very sick and he watched him more intensely in the past few months. The day Wayne passed, I found that Micah knew he had died before I told him. Whether he read my mind or used his telepathy connections that I do not have, he has a gift of knowing that most of us do not have.
However, even with his gift, he still needs to grieve and for Micah, the past month has been tough behaviorally. His sleep patterns have been erratic, his compulsive behaviors have increased, and he has been more challenging when asked to comply with certain requests, which is problematic if he wants to do something dangerous or disruptive to the rest of the household. Our hope is that in time, he will be better able to share his feelings of loss through Spelling to Communicate (S2C), but for now much of what he is thinking is still hard to discern. I know he misses Wayne and the countless caring ways Wayne reached out to support him after his father died.
The positive news is that Micah continues to make progress via S2C and sometimes, like this week, we get nuggets that give us a glimpse into his soul. This week’s lesson was on Theador Roosevelt. At the end of the lesson Beth Frede, his S2C Practitioner, asked Micah if he would have joined Theador Roosevelt’s group of Rough Riders. Micah spelled out “No”. This surprised me as I thought he would say yes because of the adventure involved. Beth then asked him why he said no, and Micah spelled out “I am a lover not a fighter”. Just. Wow.
In a world that seems to get crazier by the day, maybe we can all take the lead from Micah and his peers who just want to love.
With thankfulness to Wayne who loved and helped watch over Micah here, and I am quite certain, continues to keep watch in the world beyond the veil. You are missed.
Micah loving life in the pool during this hot summer day!
Jan Lessard Peightell June 24, 2025